The Weggie Pizza

I had a co-worker, lovely person whom I worked well with and, let me say up front, whom I respected very much.

I enjoyed visiting her in her office full of good luck chachka and other assorted imported toys from some dollar or variety store that I'd never be able to locate.

She also had her own water cooler, candy dish and coffee pot which came in handy.

But she also had an accent that once in a while gave me a delicious thrill to put to the test. You see, she couldn't pronounce her "v" very well. Not that it ever mattered -- except this once. You see, we were having an office pizza party with co-workers from other offices. This was supposed to be a morale-building, recognition from upper management to the little guy kind of shindig. So we got... pizza, no salads included (cheapos!)

We got all the required pizzas to keep the staff happy: pepperoni, mushroom, meat lovers... and the weggie pizza! Te hee!

Childish me. But a cherished moment nonetheless.

"Unremitting Bleakness" or, The Power of Words

I love words. Playing with words, combining them into quirky turns of phrase that make my friends laugh. Occasionally, ok, all too infrequently, I come across a few funnies that I have to add to my favorite words or phrases list. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a list of faves like oh, schadenfreude (You can look that one up on The Visual Thesaurus).

I really regret not getting to use that one more often...even though I feel it all the time. Bitch that I am.

This week, I read an article on Britain's banning of the video game, Manhunt 2. The reasons: "unremitting bleakness and callousness of tone ... and cumulative casual sadism in the way in which these killings are committed, and encouraged, in the game."

WOW! Now that's prose, my friends! Makes me want that game even more. I mean words like, "cumulative, casual sadism" and "unremitting bleakness" and "callousness of tone." Oh, revel for yourselves, my readers: read the news on Yahoo.

I've been in love since I read these words yesterday!

Destination: Procrastination

I need to get a grip. I'm feeling seriously unmotivated right now. I have my WIP open right now. I psyched myself up earlier in the week and got some pages done but whew! What do I use now as motivation?!?! I got up at 5:30 this morning to write but didn't get much done so I'm on the hot seat now.

I have my workspace all hooked up the way I like it. The blogs have been checked and read and posted to. Dinner. Check. Dog walked. Mail opened. Called mom. I'm screwed. I gotta start writing.

No Plot? Uh-oh! Problems!

I righted the ship for the zillionith time. Thank God for for sig others, well, for my sig other. I got to talk through some serious issues I was having with the plot. To tell you how serious, he gifted me the book No Plot? No Problem!

I didn't appreaciate it; OK, I downright resented it. I mean, so what I spend hours in my little room with Buffy playing in the background. So what if I'm totally caught up on everything Lindsay Lohan. I mean, I need breaks don't I?!?

That reminds me of my high school study patterns (and why I subsequently didn't get into a better college). I called studying "play break". I had my priorities slightly skewed, kinda like my plot. My SO asked if I liked my characters and when I hesitated, and I swear it was just for a second, he nailed me with that "uh-oh" look and asked if I'd read the book. I said NO! Really, please!

I just need to get the momentum back going again after my couple weeks of running from this thing. The whole fear of success issues that I maybe ran from blogging about. But I did write over the weekend, I met my word count goals for each day and I have to get started. Like now!

J.U.N.G.L.E.

When I was 4 or 5 years old, my mother made me sit at the kitchen table while she cooked dinner. I had to practice writing my name, address, the alphabet. And like any kid, I must have eaten up these moments, feeling as if I had her solely to myself. As an adult though, I know that it was probably a way to tether me to a seat and keep me in her sight. Not that I was a bad kid. I guess that she was a multi-tasker before it was truly popular.

But I digress. This is about writing after all...

I remember the first word that I ever spelled. While sitting performing one of these writing tasks. I put togehter a string of letters in an attmpt to spell something, anything! It read something like this:

AHTHIJGUOPLWHUNAKLEOTJKEOJUNGLEQRPASZMLKFREQW

And I asked my mom to "read" is and tell me if I spelled any words and she picked out jungle. I remember my elation to this day. I was so proud of myself and I read it over and over. And so I think that maybe, somehow, if I keep stringing paragraphs into chapters, I will have a book. It's not quite that simple but the concept of bilding something up until you hit upon something valuable, feels right.

I Want to Believe

I've been thinking about what's standing in my way... besides complacency, that is. That's way too simple. As I pile up the word count and the pages add up, I find that my progress is slower and slower. I have an outline, I have a synopsis for each chapter but I have a wall infront of finishing this thing.

I sit here and wonder why I can't pull the trigger on these pages even though I have the outline, etc. Why I can't think around some of the corners that I write myself into and I'm frustrated. Frustrated. Angry. Depressed. Not wanting to talk about progress and page counts. And now it's after 9pm and I'm just getting started writing for the evening... after I blog.

Ok, I should write not blog now.

But I worry about whether I have a strong voice, a compelling story. I want to believe, as all writers do, that I have something in the 115 pages or so that I've written. So I slog on, even on days when I'm feeling just a wee bit agnostic about this whole thing.

Angel and the Beast

So, I don't know what rock I was living under when Buffy came out but I'm addicted watching the first season on DVD. Buffy and Angel's first kiss was just so great. I am getting to rediscover so many things on DVD. I know that probably not that many people appreciated the short-lived Beauty and the Beast series from like 1980 but I got that recently too and can fall happily into my own little world and enjoy it.

Oh and I am writing tonight. Ok, I was watching Buffy at the time but I'm not too displeased with what I have so far tonight. Ok, the word count isn't there but... who's counting?!?

Yay for me!

Simple Pleasures

The past couple of weekends have been very layed back and simple. I have taken to hanging laundry out on a clothesline. Instead of laundry being a chore, I now look forward to taking the clothes outside and hanging them to dry in the sun and wind. I didn't realize how relaxing it would be with the sun on my face, the dog napping just a few feet away and the wonderful smell of clean shirts and socks in the breeze.

On top of that, I feel good about saving energy and doing the 'green' thing. I remember as a kid we had a clothesline. I don't remember too much about it. My mom says that she remembers hanging clothes out for years and years, in the middle of winter. Bringing the clothes in all stiff and forsty. I don't know yet if I'll hang out in winter but I may. It's overcast today so I haven't risked putting out another load. No guilt about that!