Lessons Learned

It's been a long few weeks. I learned that just because I "finished" my MS, that doesn't mean it's ready to roll out the door. I finished the first draft weeks ago. But guess what? I just sent it off TODAY! That's crazy to me. Now I'm in the long, slow tortuous death phase of waiting for word, any kind of word that: a) it's been received, b) it's been read or c) it's been accepted/rejected.

I'm a first-timer so I'm in considerable angst with this one. I'm trying valiantly to concentrate on my next project.

A New Day

I started my new project today. I'm so psyched about it. I absolutely love it. Well, so far. I'm doing the classic "panster" thing on it so I'm sre I'll get to the hate stage pretty soon since I'll write myself into a corner.

Anyway ~ I noticed that I bounce from amazing heights of unfounded optimism to crashes of self doubt and toilet bowl levels of confidence. So it goes.

I think that's the life I'm trying to sign up for as a writer because I don't think those feelings are ever really going to go away, especially when I'm pushing myself into unknown territory.

Going Crazy

I just finished the fourth round of edits on my novella and I feel like my brain is going to ooze out onto the floor. The feedback that I received has been immensely helpful in many ways. First, it as great to get different opinions on what worked and what didn't before I send it away. Second, I also got to really think about the story in new ways based on the feedback.

I also learned that there is no such thing as perfect. Do I still love my idea, my characters, my story? I do and that is why I am going to send it off through the submission process. I can't control the outcome but I am proud of the part that I could control. That's really all any writer can do. The rest will unravel as it will.

Quote for Today

"This morning I took out a comma and this afternoon I put it back again."

~Oscar Wilde

Interruptions

I'm in the middle of pretty major changes and this is what I look up to ~ a seriously ticked off doggie. I've been slightly ignoring him over the last several days. Today is going to be more of the same for him. I am halfway through combing through another round of revisions. But I think my story is getting close to final.

I'm going to finish it up today and start on another idea that I have.

Still editing...

I'm having a tough time of it. I thought I was all done with my edits then I let it sit for a bit and realized that I had to significantly change the opening scene. I didn't start close enough to the action. I really liked my old opening but I couldn't let myself love the words so much that it slowed the pace of everything.

So I'm slogging through, praying I don't lose what I loved about my story.

I also realized today that I have some pretty bad work habits. I get up. I pace. I play with my hair. I eat. I eat. I eat. All this takes time away from writing. I don't think it's procrastination. I think I do it to calm down ~ because I'm too nervous to commit to the writing. I'm not sure if that makes sense but it's different than my procrastination mode. That goes something more like: Let's see what's on Tivo. I need to walk the dog. Gotta clean the kitchen.

But I'm getting to know myself as a writer even more than I did before. I'm going to sumbit my novella and keep my fingers crossed. My confidence is very low but I won't get anywhere if I don't even try...

Date with Destiny

Carlos Zambrano's no-hitter has been eagerly anticipated by Cubs' fans like myself. I knew he could do it. It was just a matter of when. So when it did happen last night, it felt destined but he worked so hard over so many years and put in hours upon hours of blood sweat and tears to achieve it.

As Zambrano took the mound for the bottom of the ninth inning, I thought to myself, this is his date with destiny, to write his own history. It doesn't matter if you're a baseball fan or even a sports fan but just to be able to see someone achieve their dream, knowing the work that went into that achievement is a sight to behold. Ultimately, we all want to position ourselves for the ultimate achievement in our chosen pursuits.

EDITS FINISHED

I finished my first round of edits on my novella just this morning. Wow. Editing is not fun... at least it's not fun editing my own work. I wanted to be free, start something else, not edit. But, the devil's in the details and I had to sit down with the MS and work it over.

I'm going to give it to a few people to read today. I've got my fingers crossed that they like it.

My next struggle is to come up with a title for this. I haven't been able to come up with something that ties the story together, something that when you read the last line of the book, you go, "a-ha!"

I also have to write a synopsis. I've never written one before and I'm scared to death. I have a tendency to sell myself short; I've done it on resumes and job interview. And this synopsis is the mother of all cover letters for the dream job that I don't want to see slip away.

That's what I'm going to do today...

FINISHED

I finished the first draft of my novella yesterday. This is a really great feeling. I love the story. I love the dialog. I hope this story finds a publisher because I feel so strongly about the characters and the world I created for them.

Today is edit day. I did a complete read-through last night and made notes. I do some polishing and tweaking before handing it off to other people to read.

I guess the reason I'm so excited is that I finally feel like I've had my 'a-ha' moment with my work. All the lessons that I learned from reading about writing, from following authors who blog about writing, just clicked together for me on this one.

I'll keep blogging as I go through my first time writing a synopsis and submitting this officially. I haven't really decided where I'm sending this off to but I have an idea. I really wish I could get some advice.

I'll figure it out...the hard way. LOL!

A Day of Firsts

I have had such a good couple days of writing. Well, yesterday was better than today. I put in 7,000 words yesterday before I went to bed completely exhausted. I had one of those days where I didn't even want to stop to eat, shower, walk the dog or take a phone call.

It felt good. That kind of day was truly a first for me. When I woke up this morning, my elbow really hurt from my time at the computer. But in a strange way, I didn't mind the hurt. I finally felt like a put in an honest day's work.

I also shared my work with my Sig Other. He was very enthusiastic and gave me some great tips on areas that needed cleanup. I am going to focus on the edits just as soon as I have gotten through my last 2,000 words that I need to write today. I believe that I will have a complete first draft by the time I close up shop for the day.

This truly is a day of firsts!

I bought my first eBook today

Yeah, I'm a little behind the times. Everyone's got their readers and consumes content voraciously. I'm a bit slower on the uptake on this one but I'm looking forward to trying. I bought a Nocturne Bites title ~ Dreamcatcher by Anna Leonard. I woke up in the middle of the night and wrote this spooky paranormal story that I am going to submit to that line so I thought I'd better read what's actually getting published before I send in my MS.

And ~ if I want to be pubb'ed and sell ebooks, I had better know what they're like to read. I'll let you know. I like the premise for Dreamcatcher so I'm going to read it tonight.

Here's my quandary. I'm not sure if I should submit my MS to the publisher or find an agent for a short novella. I want to just send it away to the publisher because they give a nice little blurb on their site about how they're accepting unsolicited material for the line. But would that be a mistake? Here's the thing, I really love my story. I know that doesn't equal a hill of beans on the adding machines of business-oriented agents and publishers. But I love it and I want to package it up and send it off without have ing to first wait to see if an agent loves it too.

Any advice? Also the publisher says to send the entire MS and not to query but does this mean that I shouldn't write any kind of intro for the piece? I gots some serious questions before I run off halfcocked and get myself rejected.

It's Not About the Word Count

It's about calming that inner voice, that inner liar that is constantly inventing, weaving, fantasizing... Writing is about feeding the muse. She doesn't feed me. She doesn't have to. She would exist no matter what just to make me crazy. Writing is the only way I can put her to bed, shut her up, wrestle her down and get some peace for myself.

So I give her the page or she takes over my thoughts and doesn't let me focus on anything else. It's 2:35 am and I'm sitting at my desk. Couldn't sleep because the muse wanted to chat with me. Usually, I just listen and think, yeah, good one. Now let me get back to sleep and we can take this up at a more decent hour. But tonight, I gave in to her wishes and banged out 6 pages so far. It's now 4:15 am. I think I'll go back to bed now...

Bridge to Nowhere

Have you ever made pretty substantial plot changes and then tried to tie scenes together? I've been working like this for the past couple of weeks and I feel like I'm building a bridge to nowhere. I know, suddenly, all my posts are about Sarah Palin...

But that's exactly how I've been feeling. I've been working on this bridge and I'm not sure how I'm going to get to the other side. I have a vague idea and I keep writing and writing but I'm in uncharted territory here. I hope this works. If not, I have a whole lot of pages that won't stick together. The good news is that I like the changes that I made and I like these bridge pages but if they don't help the story along then I've wasted a lot of time and effort. But I guess that even failed writing experiments are valuable learning lessons for new writers.

It's worth it in the end because I'm starting to have more of a feel for the process and for how stories come together. Now when I read a book or watch a movie, I'm more conscious of the craft behind the writing and I enjoy stories so much more now.

A Romance Hero in the Unlikeliest Place

This is not a political blog at all. I have opinions but I'll keep them to myself.

To me, what has totally been underplayed in all the hoopla over Sarah Palin is her dashing romance hero, the "first dude," Todd Palin. Just from the few tidbits weve learned about his past, I'm already getting the rough sketches for a fantasy romance hero: hunter, oil worker, commercial fisherman, snowmobile racer who marries a beauty queen. This is something straight out of a Diana Palmer novel, reset in Alaska. He's been called a "true Alaskan," part Yupik Eskimo.

He must be that rarest mix of alpha male (all frontiersman, survivalist, manliness) and sensitive male. After all, I've read that he helps take care of their children and cooks!

Yes, there are the ups and downs on the way to love and I'd like to airbrush a few details about these two people but I like the outline so far.

I know one thing, they've got my vote for sexiest backstory of the campaign. We'll see about the rest.

How Can I Thank You?

Putting together a well-written thank you note is a tall order to fill. I mean, those two little words already accomplish so much: thank you.

What remains is the blank inside of a 5x7 note card, or rather, a whole lot of space for me to ramble and go off message. I'm one of those foolish sorts who likes to say only what is necessary and only what I really feel. So, I agonize over every little word.

Here's the scenario: I have to write five personalized thank you notes as a follow up to a marathon two and half hour interview I had yesterday. I've written three and I'm exhausted. I don't want to say the same thing over and over. What if they compare what I've written? I don't want to write something generic. These peeps are really picky and it's for a writing position so I feel like I've got to put forth the effort to win the job. It's a great job, btw. Well, I mean, as far as day jobs go.

I'm wiped. This may be all the writing I get to do today. Yikes!

First Dinner, Then Dessert

I was never any good at abiding by this rule set by most parents. In fact, as soon as I became an adult (which is still debatable), I broke this one all the time. Unfortunately, there is a reason that dinner comes before dessert or that work comes before play... to instill discipline, establish routine. I'm so bad at that still. I want to web surf before writing. I want to eat, check what's on TV. I even go so far as saying that I need to have all the dishes clean before I can get started!

I'm not a neat freak by any stretch.

I'm a born procrastinator and it's become so obvious now that I have long periods of uninterrupted time. I have to fight myself to get things done, to get motivated.

Today's big distractions (in no particular order, of course) have been: returning phone/email for my job search, blog reading/writing, dog walking/vet/dog park, daydreaming up new stories I'd like to write, laundry, eating/thinking about eating.

So ~ I have decided to keep to a more rigorous schedule over the next few days to see if that helps. I am going to try to set time allowances for each of my activities so I can still do everything... just within limits.

I have a big chunk of edits done but I just keep fiddling with it. I'm driving myself slightly insane with this project. I need to read some of the wonderful author blogs on how to edit efficiently... but I have to fit that into my new schedule!